Utterly Meaningless » Blog Archive » I DON’T GET IT

    Filed at 7:36 am under by dcobranchi

    The nickel summary– The boy has some challenges to overcome. He hates being in school. The State is paying for a tutor in his home. But his mom wants him back in school for “socialization.” I try not to be judgmental, but sometimes I just scratch my head in wonder.

    3 Responses to “I DON’T GET IT”

    Comment by
    Skip Oliva
    July 30th, 2004
    at 9:19 am

    I have no problem being judgmental — this woman is more concerned that the “community” perceive her child as normal than see that her child is educated and happy.

    Comment by
    July 30th, 2004
    at 9:34 am

    From the way she sounds so desperate, I wonder if she’s ever considered finding other means of socialization. Maybe it’s never even occurred to her that there is any other way to obtain it.

    Comment by
    Lisa in Chicago
    July 30th, 2004
    at 12:30 pm

    I’ve been lurking and reading for a while, but felt compelled to comment on this.

    My daughter has obsessive-compulsive disorder. When she was diagnosed, in October of last year, she was attending a Montessori school. School was the worst for her – it was there that her worries about germs and contamination, about poisons and telling lies were the most debilitating. She took to throwing herself on the floor and screaming when asked to do things that she couldn’t handle. She started attending half-days, and even that was awful for her. She got appropriate treatment, and got a whole lot better & went back to school.

    But in the meantime, we saw how much more she was learning with us in the afternoons, how much happier she was at home, and how ill-equipped the school was to handle her issues. So we decided to let her finish out the year at school, and then homeschool.

    The thing is that we’ve had to argue with her therapist repeatedly that we’re doing the right thing. Treatment for OCD involves controlled exposure to the triggers of anxiety. Responding to the anxiety by avoiding things that trigger it actually only makes it worse in the long run. I’m confident that we’re doing the right thing, but I am glad we let her finish out the school year once things were under control for her. Her withdrawal now doesn’t smack of avoidance. Besides, I wanted to homeschool all along. 🙂

    So this was a very long-winded comment to say that perhaps the mom is feeling that long-term avoidance of the school situation will not help her child. For someone not already convinced of the benefits of homeschooling, outside input about socialization, about not avoiding anxiety triggers, can be compelling. And when your child is doing so horribly, it’s all you can do to think clearly. I feel for this kid and his family. Sending him back to a clearly bad situation doesn’t seem the right choice to me, but I do sympathize.

    Anyway, I’m glad to be homeschooling, and appreciate your blog, which I found through the WTM website.